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Talk Less. Listen More.

 

 

This audio waveform is from an interview I did recently…

The top bar is the full conversation.

The bottom bar is the speaking of the person conducting the interview.

In the full conversation waveform, the large spikes are when the person conducting the interview is speaking, and the others are when I’m speaking.

I simply cut his portions out, and lined them up next to the full conversation, so it would function as a graph.

The full conversation, in Photoshop, was 6.012 inches.

His portion of speaking was 4.047 inches.

He spoke 67.3% of the time.

In other words, since our talk was almost exactly 60 minutes, he spoke just over 40 minutes of the interview.

My speaking was 20 minutes of the interview.

I have no judgement on the matter.  The person interviewing me is a fine person, who will certainly see this, and may feel hurt.

You shouldn’t.

This is a visual analysis that helps me affirm why I, for myself, consider it important to listen more than I speak.

I’ve always been introspective.  I still am.

I observe, and calculate.

When there is something to say, I say it.  When there isn’t, I don’t.

However, on interviews, I’m more than happy to speak.  It’s an opportunity to get my message out.

In this conversation, the interviewer was listening, when I spoke, but was more interested in having himself speak.

This may be another reason why I am a misanthropic asshole.

So, I also decided to apply this to people who message me on Facebook.

Since my goal on Facebook is to brand myself to many people, I rarely initiate conversations on Facebook.

I’m more interested in posting interesting status updates, and branded images that gets people talking on my terms.

When other people initiate the conversation, I respond, but it often turns to them simply talking about themselves.

Example:  Here is the last 10 days of a conversation.

I copy and pasted the other persons side of the messages in one text document, my side in another, and did a word count on the documents.

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The result?

Total words messaged between us:  2781

Me:  660 words messaged in 10 days.

Other Person:  2121 words messaged in 10 days.

 

Percentage of messaging between us breaks down as: 

Me:  23.7%

Other Person:  76.2%

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I’m more interested in listening, than talking.

But am I a man who thinks that talking, and listening, can take a backseat to doing?

Yes I Am.

 

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